Funny Christmas cards for your dad

Funny cards for your dad should sound like him: dry, a bit grumpy, fond of a pun. Joke about the thermostat, the roast, the way he narrates the traffic. If you can make him snort and say "cheeky", it's done its job.

3 things to write inside

Swap in their name. Change anything that doesn’t sound like you.

  1. funny [first name], I've checked and yes, I have enough petrol, yes, I've got the right charger, and no, I don't need a lift to the station. Merry Christmas.
  2. funny Dear [first name], please enjoy this card. It can't be returned to the shed and it doesn't need assembling.
  3. funny [first name], I tell everyone you're a man of few words. Please don't prove me wrong by saying "ta" and putting this on the fridge. Actually, put it on the fridge.

Questions people ask

What do you write in a Christmas card for a dad who doesn't say much?

Match him. Two or three lines is plenty. Pick one thing he taught you or did for you, say thanks, and stop before it gets awkward. A dad who doesn't say much usually reads the card more than once, so make the one line count.

Can I send my dad a funny Christmas card instead of a sentimental one?

Yes. For a lot of dads, a joke is how the sentiment gets in. A dry line about his driving or his barbecue says you know him. If you want it to land softly, add a sincere sentence at the end, short enough that he can ignore it.

How do I send a Christmas card to my dad if we live in different countries?

The card goes as a link by email or text, so distance doesn't matter. Choose the date you want it to arrive, and think about what time of day it will be where he is. Add a message that mentions something from home he'll miss.